Monday, September 1, 2014
Following his stunning admission that his administration pays so little attention to ISIS that "we have no strategy," Barack Obama attended a fundraiser (surprise!) and said that the real reason people are terrified by terror threats and "feel like the world is falling apart" is because "the world has always been messy [but] we're just noticing now because of social media."
In other words, the world hasn't really gone to hell during Barry's two terms as president - it just seems that way because we're paying too much attention!
You can prove this phenomenon to yourself quite easily: turn off your computer, your smartphone, your radio, and your television...and you'll stop hearing worrisome news about ISIS, terrorists crossing our southern borders, Russian aggression, Hamas, and the wildfire spread of Ebola. And this great relaxation technique works even better if you happen to be on a golf course!
Sadly, there are some people who continue to pay waaaay too much attention to social media, like British Prime Minister David Cameron who just said "ISIL is a greater threat to our security than we have ever seen before." Similarly, our own Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel shows signs of Twitter overexposure when he says that ISIS is "an imminent threat to every interest we have [and is] beyond anything that we've seen."
Clearly, these nervous Nellies need to take the wise advice that Barack Obama once gave Lois Lerner: "Destroy every communications device you've ever touched!"
Because, like a fallen tree in an empty forest, if a journalist is beheaded and nobody tweets about it, it doesn't make a sound.
Or require a strategy.
Bonus Cartoon: Border CrISIS
terrorist attack on the United States from the southern border.
Intelligence sources say there is increased "chatter" suggesting that such an attack might be carried out to commemorate the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks.
And frankly, Hope n' Change is glad that the intelligence agencies are raising the alarm now since, as demonstrated by the deaths of Americans in Benghazi, it never occurred to anyone in Obama's entire freaking administration that September 11th just might be a day each year to be especially vigilant.